The Big Talk – On Being Mum and Motherhood

Everything has changed and yet i am more me than i have ever been – Iain Thomas

I used to look forward to it. My biggest aspiration in life. I mean it. “I don’t want to ever leave this world with out having someone call me mum” , that was my typical response to the question, “what is the one thing you will love to achieve before you die? What’s yours ?


I have 3  kids. “You are a mother of 3?, you don’t look it at all”. That’s what they say, well how can I blame them? That’s what the see. Maybe it’s just me who can’t  look past the under eye wrinkles that thrive in my sleeplessness lifestyle. But i like it. I like that they think like that. Actually though  the tussle going on in my upperchambers looks like I have 10 kids, so if you say i dont look it, that must be the best compliment ever received. It is actually better than “You must be a strong woman”.

MotherhoodMe ? Strong woman? She is actually the laziest person alive, at least thats what she thinks.  Who puts her baby to sleep and joins them to sleep knowing fully well that you have dried “eba” pot waiting to be washed? Yes I was stupid enough to not pour some water to prevent it from drying. I really can’t explain why🙄 and i wish that was the only thing i have to do within the 5hours left before tomorrow comes. Actually Le boo called my strong woman today, If he says so then who am i to think otherwise.


But I am living my dream.  If tomorrow never comes, I would have had my best life no doubt ! No regrets. At least today I made someone happy even if it was the silliest face I had to make. I put in all that i could without expecting anything in Return. What will you do today if  it was your last day?


Since the very first day  – I was the rookiest of all rookies, I remember how magical it was- i have continued to create magic every single day that goes by. I never took motherhood 101 lessons and till today there isn’t anything like that. Its funny how even your mother’s method cannot apply, how much more that of another fellow, experimenting motherhood like you. I just do as much as my creativity can go everyday and we are happy to see tommorow. Somedays like today, the adrenaline is on the high – and so it’s a 24hr – call kind of day. In all these years i found out that, the best moms are the happy moms. Or is it the other way around – the happy moms are the best moms?


Overall It’s been a lazy ass week shaa. Ummmm…more less motivated than lazy rather, but i can’t be bothered. Even Tito’s mum confessed to feeling the same. Ahh!!! Yesterday Ana’s mum asked me to pray for her. Same calling, different challenges, similar reactions but definitely different success stories. One day at a time, the challenges never stopped coming but i have made it to baby number 3. Maybe because there is no quitting in this calling, so everyday i wake up, mentally prepare, put one foot down and the other in front of the other and off i go. Thats how we do it, backed with the prayers and encouragement we give each other and but never comparing.



Our graces are indeed different. Mummy Adun died after childbirth, Chisom also died and its more heart breaking because we wished she would live since her baby did not. So much for living the dream! Hmmmm …Well at least the peoples lives they have touched at work and their outer circles will speak for years to come. That should account for something. I guess we can still live out our dreams as women, with or without marriage and kids. It is after all an addition, and when it is time; if you can, whilst at it, do your best.

being mum

I have become a better version of me since this journey. Many things i have learnt and still l i am applying and based on the things i observed from others i am making sense of. I understand now why mummy would settle down to a large loaf and Big cup of tea after everyone else but her has had dinner. i have have even slacked on the tummy tuck exercise and its been over a week now. But it’s absolutely fine, i will just buy a girdle or something joor.. Come to think of it, there are more important issues, I am sure they too (Mummy Adun and Chisom) anticipated their banging post baby body but now ….


The real question is, “what is the most important thing to do right now?” When you truthfully answer it there in lies your happiness.

Word of the week 2Cor 12 vs 9


See you soon!

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  1. Oh man! How can we share a lot in common? Same name, 3 kids, bloggers, etc.
    it’s heartwarming really when you receive those “awwhh u don’t even look married” compliments wen u say u have 3 kids. No one really U’stands how sleepless ur life has become, how u have to cook, do laundry, clean, etc yet struggle to put it all together. It’s amazing and I wldnt hav wanted it any other way.
    Life should be lived and enjoyed. Woteva puts the smile on ur face, wit all pleasure pls!!! The goal is to become better each passing day.
    Thanks for sharing this lovely post IJ.

    1. Author

      One thing about starting this blog i love is meeting you. I am sure there is alot more to discover. .. This is just how it goes for us. Its motherhood then everything else , however it is important to keep happiness at the center so you don,t loose your sanity. Thanks for making my heart smile with your comments

  2. Aww! Such a beautiful post! Omg. So personal, so real.
    You do know that you don’t, physically, look like someone with 3 kids. All I can say is well done and may the good Lord continue to give you wisdom, understanding and the strength to rise them.

    Oréoluwa’s blog

    1. Author

      Amen! I receive the strength and wisdom. it will never be too much. Thanks dear.

  3. Hmmmmmm . . . This provoked deep thoughts. We need to enjoy the moment and live in the present. Happiness, for women, is not dependent on marriage or children. Thanks Ije!

    1. Author

      You are welcome Amaka. Yes we must all be happy, family or not. I am happy to share with you

  4. Yesss…. i am just catching up. it’s been crazily busy for me… thanks to MOTHER-HOOD and all. Awesome write up, you said it all. We still have to find that lil tiny bit of time motherhood has left for us and be happy. Thank God we really do not look link what we have been through. Thank God for the strength to cross each level of hurdle. Being a MOM is truly an awesome life time experience.

    1. Author

      Girlllll… is really awesome and every woman should aspire to it indeed. Thank God that gives us an assignment and makes sure to provide the Grace for that mission. Well done sweetie

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